AFC

Kansas City Chiefs at Houston Texans.  For those of you who love defense, this is the game for you.  Both teams will not light up the scoreboard.  The Chiefs are led by the mother of all game-managers Alex Smith.  Meanwhile, the Texans are beyond quarterback-challenged, led by the immortal Brian Hoyer.

Given that both defenses will cancel each other out, I think the Chiefs have the better offense.  Too bad for Texans fans.  Could you imagine a stud like DeAndre Hopkins with a REAL QB?  Chiefs 17, Texans 9.

Pittsburgh Steelers at Cincinnati Bengals.  Steelers fans (including yours’ truly), Bengals fans and football fans everywhere have been clamoring for this matchup.  Nothing beats a rivalry game in the playoffs, especially one where both teams hate each other.

Even though NFL officials warned both teams of chippy play before the game, I still expect lots of fights, trash talk, and perhaps cheap shots.

As for the game itself, I expect this to be a high-scoring game.  Even though the Bengals have had success against Ben Roethlisberger, I think that both teams will not have trouble moving the football.  Keep in mind that Pittsburgh’s secondary STILL cannot stop a parked car.  After all, this is the same unit who made Baltimore’s Ryan Mallet look like the second coming of Joe Montana.

The Steelers will be without a running game with DeAngelo Williams being injured (has anyone heard of Fitz Toussaint?).  And there is something about Bengals backup QB AJ McCarron.  Even though this will be his first playoff game, McCarron has the swag to get the job done.

All this leads to Marvin Lewis getting his first playoff win…  Bengals 30, Steelers 27.

NFC

Seattle Seahawks at Minnesota Vikings.  I’ll tell you what, I will tune in just to see how both squads will fare in harsh weather conditions (19 degrees below zero windchill at kickoff).  While Minnesota should have that advantage going for them at home, I don’t think much had changed since the last time these two teams met earlier this season.

Seattle’s new and improved offense is STILL flying high.  Even though “Beast Mode” himself will be back for the game, the offense will still flow through Russell Wilson.  And last time I checked, the Vikings had trouble stopping the Seahawks.  Look for that trend to continue Sunday.

Simply put, this should be another ass-whoopin’…  Seahawks 27, Vikings 10.

Green Bay Packers at Washington Redskins.  If you told the most hardcore ‘Skins fans that their team would be reppin’ the NFC East in the playoffs, two things would have happened: 1) they’d laugh at you; 2) they’d tell you “you’re going to hell for lying like that!”  But here they are, playing the best football of the season.

Kirk Cousins passed for over 4,000 yards (“you like that?!!!”), and the defense has been playing ok.  Meanwhile, the Packers look like a shell of themselves all season.

Aaron “A-a-Ron” Rodgers has not played his best this season.  The offensive line sucks, and the offense is sorely missing Jordy Nelson.  Too many things are causing the Packers to trend downward at the worst time.

Look for #HTTR Nation to celebrate Washington’s first playoff win in, well, FOREVER…  ‘Skins 24, Packers 20.

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