Author Archives: klownboy
The Bears have underachieved all season, bringing a 5-9 record into Sunday’s game against the Detroit Lions. It’s defense has been non-existent. It’s offensive line has been just that – offensive. The offense that is stocked with weapons (Brandon Marshall, Alshon Jefferies, Martellus Bennett, and Matt Forte) cannot get out its own way.
And one of the main culprits is Jay Cutler.
There is no reason on God’s green earth that a QB with such immense talent could be as bad as Cutler is right now. He is responsible for 30 (30!!!) turnovers. Now buffonish head coach Marc Trestman benched Cutler’s ass in favor of the immortal Jimmy Clausen.
I think it’s time for the Bears to jettison Cutler. Too bad he is just 14 games into a seven-year, $126.7 million contract, which means he will count too much against the salary cap the next two season (at least $18 million). The Bears may try to trade him, though they may not get but so much in return in terms of draft picks.
Nevertheless, Cutler is not the leader the Bears need for him to be, so they have to cut the cord somehow.
I’ll also go a step forward and call Cutler the second coming of Jeff George.
Now having said all of that, is it all Cutler’s fault? Hell no. Coach Trestman has failed Cutler and his team and deserves to go. Trestman single-handedly ruined the Bears’ defense. In fact, it doesn’t help that the Bears are questioning Trestman’s discipline tactics.
And let’s not stop with Cutler and Trestman. The Bears should fire the general manager for having the audacity to give Cutler that enormous contract. The entire coaching staff should go. The entire defensive side of the ball should be shown the door for being so statistically “turrible”.
I feel so bad for Bears fans. They are in my prayers…
Seattle Seahawks over Arizona Cardinals. This game will decide the NFC West. Both teams sport hellacious defenses. I love low-scoring games between two good teams, so this will be a treat for me. Even though the Cardinals are at home, they will be starting their third-string QB. That is bad news for a team going up against one of the best defenses in the league that is starting to peak right now. For that reason alone, I expect Russell Wilson and the Seahawks to win a low-scoring, physical affair. Seahawks 17, Cardinals 10.
“The Joke’s on Your Ass” Game of the Week
Titans at Jaguars. Two sorry ass 2-12 teams, both in the running for the #1 overall pick in the 2015 draft. A pair of broadcasters who are probably hating life having to call this joke of a “game” tonight. Need I say more? What were the execs at the NFL Network thinking when they made this the last Thursday night affair of the season?
If there was a merciful football god, it would open up the earth so that it would swallow both teams. Unfortunately the earth would spit those sorry fuckers right up, so… Jaguars over Titans.
Eagles over Redskins
49ers over Chargers
Dolphins over Vikings
Ravens over Texans
Lions over Bears
Panthers over Browns
Saints over Falcons (the NFC South is a God-awful division…)
Packers over Buccaneers
Chiefs over Steelers (I still do not trust my Steelers’ secondary)
Patriots over Jets
Rams over Giants
Bills over Raiders
Cowboys over Colts
Bengals over Broncos
Last week’s record: 11-5 (a little bit better…)
2014 record to date: 132-78-1 (I’m still riding high yo…)
Uh, at any rate…
1. New England Patriots
2. Seattle Seahawks
3. Denver Broncos
4. Green Bay Packers
5. Arizona Cardinals
6. Dallas Cowboys
7. Detroit Lions
8. Pittsburgh Steelers
9. Indianapolis Colts
10. Cincinnati Bengals
Come at me with your hate, you muthafuckers…
Second, let’s get our NFL weekly preview on – shall we?
Game of the Week
Dallas Cowboys at Philadelphia Eagles. Dallas is riding high off a big road win in Chicago last Thursday night. I think the memory of that humiliating curb-stomping Philly laid on Dallas on Turkey Day will motivate the Cowboys to play better. Hell, they couldn’t play any worse. Meanwhile, Eagles QB Mark Sanchez had come back to earth a bit since then, and he will be the wild-card in this matchup. I think the Eagles are pissed off at their performance against Seattle, and I believe Philly will be motivated to and will sweep Dallas in a close one.
This is going to be for all the marbles in the NFC East. That alone should make an already intense rivalry even more insane. Eagles 27, Cowboys 24.
The “Gouge Your Eyeballs” Game of the Week
Jets at Titans. Do I really have a reason to say why this game is such a waste of time? Fans at this game should either gouge out their eyeballs or suffocate themselves in paper bags.
Ass-Whupping of the Week
Ravens over Jaguars. Given what’s at stake for Baltimore and how bad Jacksonville is, I’d be shocked if the Ravens are not up by 20 at halftime…
Thursday Night’s Game
Rams over Cardinals (no, really…)
Falcons over Steelers (still not convinced my boys will get up against a sub-.500 team)
Giants over Redskins
Patriots over Dolphins
Chiefs over Raiders
Colts over Texans
Packers over Bills
Panthers over Buccaneers
Bengals over Browns
Broncos over Chargers
Lions over Vikings
Seahawks over 49ers (San Fran is a sinking ship)
Bears over Saints (the joke’s on ESPN, and I love it…)
Last week’s record: 10-6 (Not bad, but oh well…)
2014 record to date: 121-73-1 (I’m still chillin’…)
Players are arguing. Carmelo Anthony wants to fight Tim Hardaway, Jr. Hardaway wants to fight Anthony. Everyone wants to fight Anthony. No one (seemingly) respects head coach Derek Fisher.
The players want to abandon the triangle offense that new team president Phil Jackson and Fisher have have spent significant time attempting to install. Never mind the fact that Jackson won a total of 11 titles as coach of the Chicago Bulls and Los Angeles Lakers running the triangle — an offensive system which is based on post play, passing (got that ‘Melo?), and off-ball movement.
Welcome to the 2014-2015 New York Knicks.
My Knicks have evolved into such a fucking joke. I mean, ‘Melo and the gang is trying to go away from an offensive system that has become famous because it was the system that helped players like Michael Jordan and Kobe Bryant win six and five championships, respectively.
Why do players on a team that had missed the playoffs last season want to dismiss a proven offensive philosophy? It’s the same reason why such friction has led to a 4-19 record, the worst start in Knicks history.
Again, because the Knicks are a fucking joke.
Looks like the only way to fix this mess is to do two things. Either someone needs to goad Jackson into coaching this wretched team, or get rid of everyone – including ‘Melo.
In re-signing with the Knicks (and filming that “look-at-me” documentary where he basically admitted he should have signed with the Chicago Bulls) ‘Melo proved what many had opined for a long time: he is not a winner – not even close. And as long as my Knicks make his ass the centerpiece of the team, the long it will take for them to return to the promised land.
That said, as the saying goes “in every cloud there is a silver lining” – or is it the other way around? Anyway, most of those terrible-ass contracts will be come off the books. No Amare Stoudamire, and hopefully no JR Smith. Even though Smith has an option to exercise at the end of the season (he knows he won’t get his high salary anywhere else, so he may exercise it), the Knicks’ brass should eat the contract and get rid of him.
Bring in superstars who are proven winners next season such as Marc Gasol and maybe Kevin Durant, and we may be onto something. ‘Melo needs to play with such stars to show him what it means to be a winner. And I really think that would be the likely scenario.
Until then, me and other Knicks fans will have to suffer through the misery that is the 2014-2015 season. Damn.
Go ahead and send your hate. To quote the late, great Bernie Mac: “I ain’t scared of you motherfuckers…”
Drum roll please…
1) Green Bay Packers
2) New England Patriots
3) Seattle Seahawks
4) Denver Broncos
5) Arizona Cardinals
6) Philadelphia Eagles
7) Dallas Cowboys
8) Indianapolis Colts
9) Detroit Lions
10) Pittsburgh Steelers
Why is the lone unbeaten team among the Power Five conferences – and in all of college football – not ranked #1? Why did it keep putting one-loss teams in front of said undefeated team? Even worse, why put TCU in front of Florida State???
However, upon seeing the last CFP rankings I have to say something – and I can’t believe I am about to type this.
The committee got it right.
First of all, I will not debate the merits of Alabama and Oregon. Yes they did sustain one loss each, but let’s not kid ourselves. Those are the best two teams in college football – period.
So let’s turn to the following teams: Florida State, Ohio State, TCU, and Baylor. The committee would have been stuck on stupid if it had left the undefeated defending national champion Seminoles out of the playoffs. Sure, FSU had been shitted on despite their perfect record all season long. I mean if it wasn’t them not maintaining “game control” (whatever the fuck that means), it was being clowned for their schedule (despite playing the most Power 5 conference teams in the country). However 13-0 is 13-0, and FSU was not going to be denied.
As for Ohio State, any time a team curb-stomps what I thought was a good team for the Big Ten championship with its THIRD-STRING QB, it is more than deserving. 59-0 over Wisconsin? No question with the Buckeyes’ selection either.
Which brings us to TCU and Baylor. Look, both squads had AMAZING seasons. Both finished 11-1 and are co-champions of the Big 12. Herein lies the problem: the “co-champions” part. The committee was not going to be picking ANY co-champion.
I could go on and say that Baylor needs to schedule better out-of-conference opponents. I could also say that TCU should not choked against Baylor in the final quarter earlier this season.
The fact of the matter is the committee has punished the Big 12 for not having a conference championship game. I thought the Big-12 was trying to get off easy and back-door its way into the playoff by not doing so.
Here is some unsolicited advice: grab two more teams (Cincinnati and BYU) and have a conference championship game like everyone else. Oh, and schedule better too…